2012: Italy vs England – 4-2- Fuck You !

There is only two successful examples for now of Italians coming  together, in tragedy, or in soccer against the rest of the World.

But nothing yet beats soccer, not even tragedies, because in tragedies the HIGH is missing, we are United in the Low of an experience, in soccer, when ‘We’ win, we get united in the HIGH, we get all the energy of the losers, because Sports for a long time has not been the healthy coming together of sane people playing for fun,  Sport too has been swallowed by the Money Monster and now it’s no longer as when I was a kid, where there was one game only on Sundays, now we have soccer tournaments, soccer channels, soccer paraphernalia, everything to show who we are for and who we stand against, at the same time.

Soccer has become another manifestation of our desire to compete and win, for the sake of feeling good about ourselves, for the purpose of feeling braver, stronger, better than someone else, just for 90 minutes during which we are possessed and go out on balconies screaming and shouting our own perceived achievements as ‘supporters’ of a group vs another.

 There is tons of Money nowadays revolving around the business of soccer, players are paid like movie stars and so are coaches, games, bribes to change the result of a game on which people are betting More Money, because Money is never enough and when and if we allow Money to become the Value of our existence we will notice that there is not enough Money in the World to put us at ease, because Life is Priceless and so it doesn’t matter how much Money we get, bet and win, or just spend to belong to the winning team, we end up losing all the time, we lose out to an Idea of What Life is, as an experience and the achievement of Highs vs the fear of the Lows.

Last night we won

Here’s to us

Here’s to love

All the times the we messed up

Here’s to you

Fill the glass

Cause the last few nights have gone too fast

If they give you hell

Tell ’em to forget themselves

(Go fuck themselves)

Here’s to us

(Here’s to us)

and here goes a typical song for fans, to highlight what is it that we are hoping to get out of a match, it’s not the Game we enjoy, nope, it’s competing with others who may lose and give up their energy to us and if we are involved higher in the Food Chain,  their Money/Energy to us because within a competition something/someone always Has to Give.

It’s not the game we enjoy, it’s the Fuck You Mate, Here’s to us.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not notice that since I was a kid sport has become more and more violent as an outlet for the suppressed rage for the lives we are living as experiences of energy that need an outlet and a Hope that we may be filled up by telling someone else ‘Fuck You’ and get from them what they lose within losing a ‘game’

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that sport was a healthy hobby, when evidence is everywhere that sports like everything else has been turned into a money-making machine with the added bonus of becoming an outlet for all suppressed emotions of the populace so they will not go out in demonic possession and attack each other in the streets

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that sport was healthier when I was a kid, failing to see that we have just upped the stakes in terms of Money and Energy to match what is going on inside of us and the mismanagement of our own energetic creation and participation

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel annoyed last night when I heard people scream from the window because I am busy with my own process and with changing me to change the world, without seeing or understanding that what goes on outside my window is going on inside of me when I play my own energetic games and I want to scream and shout out my own suppression and bottling up, which is what All of Us are going through at various degree, One and Equal

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see and realize that the world has never changed, because at the time of the Romans we had Bread and Circus and Now we have Bread and Circus, in fact every day less Bread and More Circus in the attempt to balance out what is Not working within our reality but we do not want to face and take responsibility for

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel proud when today I spoke to one of my male friend and he told me the results and I said ‘the important thing is that we Won’ and I could not relate to this sentence because it’s in fact NOT important at al, but I feared not participating in the Energy Game with Him and His Winer Joy and not be accepted

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to never speak my mind about soccer, in fear that I will not be accepted within a soccer oriented society more than ‘I’m not interested’ which is Equal to and One with everything that happens in our society, where we do not take a stand and just say what we see it’s in fact happening because we fear rejection and being told we are party poopers when the party is nowhere to be seen but in our Minds that keep us apart from reality and what is going on

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being a party pooper and someone who doesn’t bring ‘joy’ to the table, even though I see and realize that this ‘joy’ we talk about is just found in winning over someone who must then be the loser and that this winning and losing is what manifests in our society into Inequality as everybody wants a piece of the winning game not caring about who will have to lose out and get to feel diminished

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that competing in sport must have winners and losers, because I cannot yet imagine another way of doing sport since this is the only way I have seen and been taught and I have not yet restored myself to sanity enough to see a different way for sport to exists that can support All Equally

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take pride in the victories of Italy in the past and for rubbing them in the face of non Italians as an achievement, in which we could for a moment vicariously glorify ourselves as ‘Here is to Us’, and ask others to bow down in their own perceived diminishment within the winner/loser game

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compete in winner/losers game, hoping to win, fearing to lose and the shame that goes to losers, without realizing that the shame I did not want to feel would be left for someone else to feel, not realizing the insanity of these game of emotions and energetic gains over others, existing in and as conflict first inside myself and then as a manifested consequence outside of me in everything of this world, from Schools to Pageants, to Sport, to Jobs, to Wellbeing and ultimately to Wars as the culmination of our desire to win over others and have the Ultimate undeniable ‘Fuck You’.

When and as I see myself desiring to compete for that High that I could get if I won, I stop, breathe, remind myself I no longer wish to participate in this creation in and as competition and that since I don’t like losing I must stop liking winning as they are both existing within the same polarity equation, while Life is not a Polarity or an energetic Game, but Self Expression Here in every moment of Breath, One and Equal in and as myself and all existence as One.

I commit myself to stop myself from existing in and as competition, as competition as a race for Energy fill ups and fixes is Not Life and to investigate where and how I compete automatically to remove those constructs in and as Me so I may stand as Life for Life Here in and as Breath and What is best for All.

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